


Bathwater

by sidnihoudini



Category: Smosh
Genre: M/M, Prompt Fic, Various Shorts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-22
Updated: 2015-04-05
Packaged: 2018-03-19 01:22:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 18,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3591051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidnihoudini/pseuds/sidnihoudini
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Me love tumblr prompts.  Various fics, various ratings, various plots, all Ian/Anthony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. waves

**Author's Note:**

> Ian and Anthony are filming on a beach when they decide to go surfing, soon though Ian wipes out and Anthony has to save him. Heartfelt confessions ensue. (Fluff af) :3

They’re testing out a new waterproof camera under the guise of filming a Lunchtime episode, mostly because Ian had wanted to get burritos and Anthony had actually wanted to go surfing.

Anthony had never been very good at skateboarding but for some reason he was a total savant out on the water; he’d taken a lesson on a whim when he’d been in Hawaii a few years ago, and had tried to get a monthly session in since.

“Is that a real thing, like… waiting an hour after you eat?” Ian asks, as they wander down the beach towards the water.

Anthony’s holding the camera in one hand, a knapsack full of their junk over one shoulder, and his board under his other arm. Behind him, Ian is carrying his own board and the remains of their lunch. Everything is harder when you’re trying to walk through sand, even when you’re just trying to carry fairly normal, everyday objects.

“You gon sink,” Anthony answers, holding the camera up over his shoulder to get a shot of Ian. “Actually, nevermind. I’m pretty sure Mythbusters said that wasn’t true.”

Ian hates Mythbusters - one of those weird things that you’d only know if you watched hungover Discovery channel marathons with him on the reg - and grimaces before ultimately replying, “Myth busted.”

Anthony burps and then groans, ignoring the sound of Ian laughing behind him.

They’d both sat in the dry sand up at the top of the beach after getting burritos from a little food cart on the boardwalk, their suits down around their waists to combat totally baking in the overcast sun as they’d done first bite. The food had been delicious, but ultimately way too much to consume before partaking in any kind of water based activity.

Luckily it’s one of those days where there aren’t a crazy amount of people on the beach, no families or children anyways, just surfers and windboarders who are likely out here no matter the weather.

“You wanna go first?” Anthony asks, as they come to stand at the edge of the water. He unceremoniously dumps their knapsack in the sand, and then lets his board fall awkwardly on top of it.

He turns to hold the camera up towards Ian, as Ian stands there staring out over the water.

“I guess,” He says, in a way that makes Anthony laugh. He doesn’t sound sure at all, but he starts pulling the wetsuit up over his shoulders anyways.

Anthony laughs and then adds, panning down Ian’s body, “You look awesome right now.”

“Sexy body,” Ian replies in Fat Bastard’s voice, as he gets the suit zipped up and then pivots around on one foot, showing how the suit is basically working as a second skin.

Grinning, Anthony watches as Ian waves at the camera and then begins making his way down to the beach, and into the water.

He isn’t exactly the most coordinated person Anthony’s ever met, and that’s pretty obvious as he watches Ian try and get on top of the board. Dude was good at sports, put him on a field with some solid ground under his feet and he’d almost be considered athletic, but that didn’t really translate to the ocean.

“Oh my god,” Ian is yelling out of frustration, sounding a little water logged and out of breath as he gets thrown off the board one more time.

Anthony laughs and zooms in on Ian’s face. He can’t wait until they have all the wide shots done so he can actually try this shit out under water.

“Try to stay up!” Anthony yells back, still laughing a little bit as Ian fumbles, but ultimately manages to get up on the board. 

He has a moment of success, until another wave comes up underneath him and knocks his balance off. One second Ian is standing on top of the water, and then next he’s in the air with the board a few feet above him. Ian crashes into the water first, and the board comes down directly on top of his head.

“Fuck,” Anthony swears. He forgets about filming and jogs down to the edge of the water instead, just as Ian’s board is resurfacing. A moment later Ian’s head breaks above the surface of the water, followed by the sound of Ian coughing, watery choking noises as he fights to not inhale anymore water.

Ian looks totally dazed as he breaks the water’s surface, hair flattened down over his forehead and eyes. He manages to get himself upright, and starts walking towards the sand, where Anthony is standing with ocean water up to his ankles.

“I’m, ugh,” Ian groans, stopping to choke again and spit into the ocean. He wobbles back and forth for a minute, and then adds, “Really nauseous.”

Anthony jogs the rest of the way into the water, meeting Ian where he’s a few feet in. He grabs Ian’s board in one hand and wraps his other arm around Ian’s shoulders to lead him back to the sand.

“Are you dizzy?” Anthony asks, dropping the board in the sand and squatting down to unbuckle the cord from around Ian’s ankle. “Do you remember everything?”

Groaning again, Ian tries to unzip his wetsuit, but ends up just fumbling with the zipper before he reiterates, sounding miserable, “I’m gonna puke.”

“Look at me,” Anthony says, pushing all of the wet hair back off of Ian’s forehead before he reaches down to unzip the neck of his suit. Ian looks into his face unsteadily. “Okay. Fuck. Concussions freak me out.”

Ian staggers a few feet through the sand, until he groans again and turns around, dropping backwards to sit, “Everything freaks you out. Where’s the camera?”

“Forget about the camera, it’s with our shit,” Anthony replies. He’s always been terrible in situations like this; his anxiety ends up making him bark a lot and generally sound pissed off. “Do you still need to puke?”

Shaking his head, Ian drops his head into his hands and then groans again, leaning into Anthony when Anthony sits down in the sand beside him.

“Surfing is over,” Anthony says, wrapping one arm around Ian’s shoulders.

Ian laughs despite himself and smacks Anthony’s hand away when he feels him poking around on his head, in his hair.

“I’m fine,” He reiterates, grabbing Anthony’s hand before it has a chance to make its way back onto the top of his head. He holds Anthony’s hand in-between his own in his lap, and closes his eyes. “Okay maybe I am a little dizzy now.”

Anthony slides his thumb back and forth over Ian’s knuckles a few times before he leans to the side, stretching to reach for the knapsack and camera.

“I definitely rate this a one out of ten thousand surfboards,” Ian says, as Anthony is trying to wiggle his wet hand into the knapsack so he can get his phone out and call them an Uber.

That makes him laugh despite himself. He looks back at Ian and asks, “Why does it get one?”

“The burrito was pretty good,” Ian admits, grinning despite himself when Anthony laughs again and sighs, shaking his head.


	2. you can have my everything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category- Angst/Fluff Ian and Anthony get stuck in an elevator together for 4 hours. It's gets pretty boring in there so they play a game of would you rather. When Anthony asks him, "would you rather fall in love with me and keep it a secret or take a chance and tell me?" How will Ian respond?

“This isn’t the worst day of my life,” Ian announces, leaning back against the wall of the elevator. “But it’s pretty damn close.”

They’re both sitting across from one another, Ian with his legs bent up in front of him, and Anthony cross-legged. Luckily they’d just gone on a coffee run before they’d arrived at this office building; if they hadn’t picked up that scone, fruit cup and coffees, Ian isn’t sure that they would have survived this long.

“How long has it been again?” Anthony asks, picking up his phone for the millionth time. No matter how many times he picks it up, it isn’t gonna change the fact that neither of them have cellphone reception in this elevator shaft.

Ian frowns and lets his hands dangle between his knees.

“Two hours,” He says, voice flat. They’d only been discovered a wild fifteen minutes ago. “I guess we’re low priority.”

Sighing, Anthony reiterates, “Low hanging fruit.”

“That’s us,” Ian nods, kicking his legs out in front of him. He toes Anthony’s legs and leans his head back against the wall again. Thank god they’re not stuck standing for two hours. Ian doesn’t think he’d be so casual with a stranger, but you never know. Maybe elevator life changed a man. “Let’s play a game.”

Anthony frowns and pushes the toe of Ian’s shoe away from his pants.

“You can’t play eye spy when the only thing in here is you, me, and some elevator paneling,” Anthony replies, the downer in their elevator party.

Making a face, Ian kicks Anthony’s hand and says, “You have no imagination. Would you rather play eye spy, or have snap bracelets for arms?”

“Oh my god,” Anthony says, immediately starting to laugh. “What the fuck? Snap bracelets for arms?”

Grinning, Ian raises his eyebrows and says, “Answer the question.”

“I would rather have snap bracelets for arms,” Anthony replies, stoically. He uncrosses his legs, one of his feet already half pins and needles, and asks, “Would you rather have sex with a ghost or get stuck at a border crossing for twelve hours?”

Ian makes a face - two terrible options - and hmms and haws for a minute before he answers, “Probably the ghost. Fucking a ghost would be wild. Think about it, your dick would get all cold. You’d be able to see your come just, you know, like… floating around.”

“Casper, man. I always had a crush on that dude when I was a kid,” Anthony laughs, as Ian covers his face with one hand and starts to cackle.

Once he recovers, Ian manages to say, “Never say that to anyone else. Telling me was too many people; that’s shit you die with, man.”

“Everyone’s got a crush on Casper,” Anthony says, a tiny smile on his face.

Ian makes a ‘sure’ face, and moves on to the next hypothetical.

A few rounds later, Anthony is picking the last bits of strawberry out of the bottom of his fruit cup, when he asks, “Would you rather fall in love with me and keep it a secret, or would you take a chance and tell me?”

It’s only a small space, and it doesn’t take much for the energy to shift. Anthony’s words do a fine job of changing the light air into heavy, electricity charged static.

“Secret,” Ian answers, as they watch each other carefully. “That’s another one you take to the grave.”

Anthony smiles again, just a lilt of the lips, and says, “Having animal sex with Casper, and falling in love with your best friend.”

“Put that on my tombstone,” Ian reiterates, smiling.


	3. hollaback girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dramatic Fanfiction Reading 5 when they read a fanfiction mentioning how Ian probably broke up with Melanie for Anthony. When Anthony gets curious and asks Ian does he really need an answer because the shock and fright in Ian's eyes tells him everything he needs to know. (Maybe include a kiss at the end pls?" :)

“Hey man, I don’t want to like…” Anthony trails off as he walks into the kitchen, coming to stand beside Ian at the sink.

Ian is wrist deep in water - the coffee machine is jammed again and honestly Ian is this close to just going to Walmart even though it’s currently 2AM on a Wednesday - as he glances over at Anthony, still just standing there.

“I don’t know how to answer that yet,” He says, looking back down at the sink. Motherfucking cheap ass Hamilton Beach and their goddamn plastic coffee maker components. 

Frowning, Anthony licks his lips and leans against the counter with one hip, watching Ian’s hands in the water as he says, “I don’t want to make things awkward between us.”

“If this is about the fanfiction I’m gonna stop you right there,” Ian announces, reaching to turn the tap on.

Anthony laughs, a smile creeping across his face as he says, “It’s not about the fanfiction. Well it kind of is, but not really.”

“Look at this bullshit,” Ian bitches, holding a filter out for Anthony to look at. Anthony has no idea why Ian’s so mad about a coffee maker that they bought for $19.99 five years ago, it was just one of those things that made Ian so strangely Ian. “No wonder if gets all jammed up all the time.”

Frowning, Anthony asks, “Did you break up with Mel because of me?”

“What?” Ian blurts, dropping the filter back into the sink water.

Oops, Anthony thinks, watching the filter sink to the bottom of their sink. Ian turns to the side so they’re actually face to face, and looks like he doesn’t know what to say as he opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, but just ends up closing it instead.

“I was, you know. Reading that story this afternoon just…” Anthony doesn’t quite know how to explain what he’s thinking, he doesn’t even know how to sort out everything in his head right now. If you gave him a pen and paper he’s pretty sure all he’d be capable of doing is writing Ian’s name. “It made me look at things differently. I didn’t mean to.”

Ian still isn’t saying anything. He looks startled, like Anthony has caught him doing something they both know neither of them are allowed to do.

“I never would have told you,” Ian finally says. “I wouldn’t put that on you.”

He doesn’t mean to do it, but Anthony laughs. Maybe it’s a nervous reaction, maybe it’s just because he doesn’t know what to say. But all of a sudden he’s giggling, hopelessly, as Ian stares at him, horrified.

“Sorry, I’m sorry, oh my god I can’t stop,” Anthony babbles, still hiccuping laughter as he looks up at the ceiling. “I’m not… I’m not laughing at you.”

Ian rolls his eyes and reaches into the sink, unplugging the stopper.

“I’m going to the store, I’m going to buy a new coffee maker,” He says, voice flat as he wipes his hands off on a tea towel and starts to walk away. “If I don’t come back it’s because I’ve crossed state lines.”

Getting himself under control, Anthony reaches for Ian as he walks by, and snags him by the forearm.

“Don’t go,” Anthony says, still grinning despite himself. Ian boggles at him, clearly horrified with the entire situation, until Anthony’s hand moves from Ian’s lower arm to his shoulder instead. “I’m sorry, I laugh when I get nervous.”

Ian frowns, watching Anthony’s face, the slow flush creeping up his cheeks as he inches closer. Fuck, Anthony thinks, completely terrified as he leans in. He can’t stop it - the crazy part of his brain is repeating can’t stop won’t stop in repeat.

When they kiss it’s completely different from how Anthony always thought it would feel. Ian’s still too much in a state of shock to do anything, he just stands there with his mouth half hanging open as Anthony kisses his bottom lip awkwardly.

“Ian,” Anthony murmurs, tugging Ian forward by the front of his t-shirt. “Please don’t leave me hanging.”

What he doesn’t say out loud is: I’m scared.

“Yeah,” Ian replies. It almost just sounds like he’s saying it to himself, before he grabs Anthony’s face and leans in, pressing their mouths together.


	4. circles and triangles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anthony is in the military and Ian misses him to the point of breaking. Anthony then comes home ready to be with Ian…

It’s nerve wracking, coming home.

Anthony’s fidgeting the entire cab ride into town. He’s seen surprise proposals on Ellen and homecoming videos shot on iPhones and played on AFV. He feels so woefully unprepared for this he almost feels delirious with it; fingers scratching at the fabric of his khaki pants, toe tapping against the carpet in the cab floor.

He promised himself that when he left he’d be truthful with himself if he got the chance to come back home. Three years have passed and he’s seen men die, but he’s crossed borders back into California and he can’t go back on a promise to himself.

It’s strange, the idea of finally telling Ian everything he’d kept hidden for years. They talked often, maybe once a month. Ian had been dating someone up until a few months ago, and Anthony hadn’t heard about anyone new since. He feels nauseous at the thought of it, the idea of missing Ian by just a few weeks.

The cab drops him off at Ian’s place in Sacramento, and it feels deliciously underwhelming when he crawls out of the backseat with only a knapsack full of garbage to his name. He has a few mementos, photos, but other than that, what use did he have for army regulation clothing in his life?

He’s halfway up the walkway when the front door slams open and then Ian is standing there, looking like he’s seen a ghost.

“You’re here,” Ian blurts, freezing on the top step.

For some reason all Anthony can do is shrug his shoulders and smile, feeling a little bit bashful now that he had Ian standing there, staring back at him. It’d been three fucking years, Anthony can’t believe he’s actually seeing Ian in the flesh. It was a novelty, to see Ian’s hands and ankles and throat in real life like that.

“Yeah,” Is all that Anthony can manage to say. The air in his lungs comes out in a big rush, he hadn’t realized the weight he’d been carrying on his shoulders but in that moment it all comes tumbling to the floor.

Ian bounces down the front steps and closes the distance between them in about four strides. Anthony doesn’t know why or how it happens but all of a sudden there are tears in his eyes as he clutches back at Ian, his fingers tight and twisted in the soft fabric of his t-shirt.

“God fucking damnit,” Ian mumbles into his shoulder, sounding like he’s just as choked up. He laughs a bit and Anthony feels him shake his head before he tightens his grip again, pulling Anthony flat up against him.

They stand like that for a long while, in the baking Sacramento sun halfway down the walkway of Ian’s house. Anthony hasn’t even looked him in the face yet; it’s been enough just to feel Ian like this, close, a real human being and not just a pixelated video streaming from the other side of the country.

“We should talk,” Anthony says, pulling away from Ian enough to take a step back and look at him properly. “I have something important I need to say.”

Ian nods, scrubbing a hand through his hair as they both turn around to head into the house.

“Me too, actually,” He adds, voice soft as he follows after Anthony.


	5. 20,000,000

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: It's the last 30 minutes of Smosh Appreciation Week and Ian and Anthony get ready to upload a special video for it. Will the smoshers still appreciate them after seeing it? (Triggers: coming out, angst, fluff)

“This is fucking terrifying,” Anthony laughs, voice tight with nervousness as he turns to look at Ian over his shoulder. “Are you as scared as I am?”

If he is freaked out, Ian is holding himself together pretty well. He’s leaning against the armrest of Anthony’s couch, hands in his lap as he watches the computer screen on the desk over Anthony’s shoulder.

“Kind of. I don’t know. I’m pretty sure people are going to think it’s a joke,” Ian admits, shrugging his shoulders.

Anthony rolls over in his office chair, not stopping until he hits Ian’s foot with the wheel and Ian smacks him before reaching down to feel for any broken toes.

“Sorry,” Anthony apologizes, even though it’s pretty obvious he’s not. He grins and leans forward, leaning his forehead against Ian’s stomach and closing his eyes. “This is making me feel better.”

Toes accounted for, Ian entertains Anthony leaning against him as he watches the video upload tortuously slowly. He frowns a little as he starts to consider the possible outcomes for coming out via YouTube, and touches Anthony’s hair, twisting the ends between his fingers as he imagines what tomorrow morning is going to look like.

“Should we skip town?” He blurts suddenly. He must accidentally twist too tightly because Anthony swears and reaches up to knock Ian’s hand away, his own fingers feeling over his scalp once Ian has retreated. “We’ve been wanting to take a vacation. Maybe we should get some standby seats. We can go somewhere warm.”

Groaning, Anthony sits up properly and reaches for Ian’s hand, holding it between both of his as he says, “Los Angeles is warm. We’re not going to run away from this. We’re committing. Right? Should we go get some booze or something? I only have tequila left.”

“Gross,” Ian grimaces, making a face at the idea. “Let’s post it and then go get something to eat. And also stop at the liquor store on the way home.”

Anthony grins, looking a little devilish as he spins around in the chair, takes a deep breath, and hits ‘publish.’

“We have officially committed,” He announces, turning back to eye Ian cautiously. “The internet remembers everything. Forever.”

Ian laughs a little out of nervousness, exhaling hard, and reaches for Anthony again.

“Guess we better mean it, then,” He says, softly.


	6. the great below

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request for Ianthony fanfiction? Category: Smut. Plot: Anthony invites Ian over for shooting a new Lunchtime With Smosh video, which turns out to be a Dinnertime With Smosh. It's already 10 PM and the guys just finished the shooting. Ian packs his things so he can get back home, but of all sudden it's starts raining a lot. Anthony insists for his best friend to stay in his apartment until the storm is over and of course, things start to happen.

“Dude, you really shouldn’t drive in this,” Anthony says again, looking out over the city, and how it’s currently getting pounded with torrential rain. He’s feeling a little Dr. Evil-ey, standing there with Pip in one arm as he stares out at the city unfolding beneath them. He glances over his shoulder and adds, “You know how everyone drives like we’re under ten feet of snow as soon as a raindrop falls from the sky.”

Ian’s standing across the loft, half in his shoes and half packed back up. The only thing he hasn’t jammed back into his bag is his laptop, and the deli sandwich he bought a few hours ago as a snack for the drive home.

“I guess I could wait it out,” Ian says after a minute, even though he doesn’t sound totally convinced. He starts toeing off the sneaker he put on a few minutes ago, and pulls his phone out of his pocket. “I gotta call Daisy’s kennel, though. I was supposed to pick her up tonight.”

Waving one hand, Anthony lets Pip jump out of his arms and onto the table.

“Go for it, man,” He says, shrugging.

*

“Oh my god,” Ian says an hour later, when the power goes out.

They’re sitting on either end of the couch, Anthony stretched out and Ian tucked into his usual watching TV couch stance, and turn to look at each other as the whole room is immediately shrouded in darkness.

“Candles,” Anthony shrugs, starting to climb up off of the couch.

Outside the rain continues to slam against the windows in waves. It isn’t even rainfall anymore actually, Ian thinks, watching. It’s like someone is just throwing bucket after bucket of water at the glass, hoping for something to stick.

*

“You wanna go butt to butt?” Ian calls, standing on the other side of Anthony’s bed with a throw pillow in his hands. “Why do you have so many small pillows?”

Anthony comes out of the bathroom, wearing a pair of pajama pants and nothing else.

“They look nice,” Anthony replies, laughing and catching the pillow as Ian throws it at his head with a bit of a hook. “I don’t care, we can start butt to butt, but you know I’m a mover. I might get all up in you in the middle of the night.”

That makes Ian feel a little more frazzled than he’d expected. There’s just something too intimate about this, sitting with Anthony in the dark with candles stashed all around the room. He isn’t sure whats going to kill him first: the tight, panicked feeling in his chest, or the potential fire hazard of open flame.

“Alright, well...” Ian trails off, pulling the sheets back. “I’m just going to do my thing, mostly on... this side of the bed.”

Anthony nods and starts to tug at his own side of the bed clothes, tossing a few pillows onto the floor before he starts to crawl in. As he settles down on the mattress, Ian gets in too, feeling more awkward than he’d anticipated as he gets his legs in and stiffly lays back against the pillows.

There’s no reason for this to be so weird. They’ve shared a bed probably a million times over the years, from camping to sleepovers to drunkenly passing out next to one another in their late teens and early twenties. But that’s what makes it so weird - is that this IS weird - deliciously so, so weird that Ian can almost feel it on the tip of his tongue.

Exhaling, he leans his head back against the pillow, and stiffly moves himself around, getting into a comfortable position.

He falls asleep slowly, listening to the sound of the rain falling outside.

*

He wakes up a few hours later, with Anthony’s boner decidedly pressed up against the middle of his back.

Ian has a moment of panic. Oh my god, oh my god. His sleep riddled brain is stuck on loop and all that it can manage is “oh my god,” which is about as far as his suddenly 13 year old brain can get. In about five seconds flat, he’s gone from hazy with sleep to dangerously wide awake.

His moment of panic is like a drop in the water in a swimming pool of anxiety when he feels Anthony’s arm shift, and start to slide around his torso. Ian closes his eyes and thinks of the federation as Anthony moves his arm until he’s all snugged up around Ian’s waist. Oh my god, Ian continues to think.

It takes about fifteen minutes for Anthony to wake himself up. In that time Ian had spun crazily through all of the options he could reasonably think of for managing the current situation: falling back asleep, pretending nothing was happening, picking Anthony’s arm up, sliding out of the bed... Oh my god, Ian thinks, I can’t remember how to breathe.

“What,” He hears Anthony say from behind him, his voice soft. He sounds confused, and Ian’s stomach drops down into his toes as he realizes that Anthony’s woken himself up.

Ian twists his head against the pillow, turning until he’s looking back at Anthony’s face, confused and sleep soft, hair stuck up in about twenty different directions. Ian opens his mouth to say something but no words come out.

They watch each other confusedly for a few heavy moments, the darkness weighing on them like a warm blanket as neither of them move. It’s Anthony who leans in first, just an inch of movement forwards. Ian’s stomach is no longer in his body at all, suddenly it’s joined hands with his brain and has run off to elope in Vegas.

Anthony kisses him and feels as though he’s been swallowed whole.

It escalates quickly. Suddenly Ian’s hands are on the back of Anthony’s head, grabbing, tugging him closer, and Anthony is making noises, moaning, trying to shift himself around and get Ian underneath him. Ian drops his head back against the pillow as Anthony starts to move down his chin, his throat, sucking his skin as he moves from adam’s apple to collarbone.

“Oh my god,” Ian manages to say, as Anthony crawls back up the bed to kiss him again.


	7. TKO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, another Ianthony fanfic request! Type: Drama. Plot: It's November 30th, Ian's birthday. He and Anthony have been a couple for 2 months. He and a bunch of friends are partying hard in a club. The only guest who still hasn't arrived is Anthony. It's getting really late and Ian gives up on waiting for his boyfriends. When he gets back home, the first thing he sees is Anthony and an unknown girl, making out on the couch. Ian is heartbroken as his bestfriend is cheating.

“Dude, I’m sure he’ll be here soon,” Mari says, patting him on the back. Over the years she’s morphed into this weird combination of half mom, half bro. Ian grimaces at her and picks his drink back up off the table. She rolls her eyes and pats his cheek, saying, “Trust me. The last thing he’d do is miss your birthday.”

*

“What? He’s not here yet?” Jaden yells at him, half drunk and looking a little wild in the eyes as she yells over the club music. “What an asshole! Come on, let’s get more drinks.”

*

“I called him,” Ryan says, his face lit up by the bright screen of his iPhone. He shakes his head, shrugs, and switches between his phone app and his text messages. “Let me text him, maybe he got stuck somewhere.”

*

“Whatever, fuck him,” Melanie says, after rolling into his party just before midnight. She buys them grey goose doubles and pats him on the head as they sit together on one of the lounge couches. “If he’s doing this on purpose, you can do better than that. If he’s been in an accident, I’m sure he’ll be okay.”

*

It’s 1AM and Ian has given up. He has no fucking idea what Anthony is doing, or where he is. He hasn’t received a call from Anthony’s mother, the cops, or any of their shared acquaintances - mostly because they’re all here partying - so he figures Anthony is safe, just fucking stupid.

He’s so drunk Jovenshire has to load him into a taxi. That isn’t the best way to start out turning 28, but he had rung in his 22nd with even less dignity so at least he’s taking a step up as he approaches his twilight years.

The taxi driver is trying to hold a conversation with him, but Ian is too drunk to be sociable. He’s fucking sweaty and gross and vaguely nauseous, and all that he can do is roll his forehead against the window as the taxi presumably takes him to the right address.

Twenty minutes later they roll up outside of Anthony’s apartment, in the industrial part of town that he’d only looked at so he could get a view of the neon signs in Japantown. Ian manages to pick out the right credit card and sign his name on the receipt the cab driver hands him, and that’s about where his coordination maxes out.

He uses his keycard to get into the building, punches the right floor number in the elevator, and leans against the wall as each floor dings passed. He has no idea what to expect when he walks into Anthony’s apartment; he hopes Anthony hasn’t done something totally fucking stupid, like falling and cracking his head open on the floor.

One time they’d joked that if Anthony ever died alone Pip would probably start to eat his body, but Ian really doesn’t want to stick around to see the real life punchline of that.

Swaying down the hallway, Ian comes to a stop in front of Anthony’s door, and fumbles through his keychain as he looks right the right key. He’s got way too many fucking keys, he rants to himself, drunk and now off the chain. He needs to sell his place in Sacramento, keeping the production house there is fine but he no longer needs a residential place for himself in the suburbs.

The door swings open, and the first thing Ian registers is movement. His brain is too drunk, too tired, too confused to make much sense of it - it’s so dark, Ian can’t make out what’s happening until he’s halfway across the room.

“Fuck you,” He says, a knee-jerk reaction to seeing Anthony on top of someone else, her hands twisted up into the couch cushions. Ian’s stomach twists into a thousand painful knots and he cringes, the physical aftershock to seeing everything fall apart right in front of him.

Anthony falls off of the couch; the girl screams and tries to cover herself up. Ian is the fuck out of there, he’s spun around and started walking back towards the front door so fast the entire room is slanting to one side.

“Ian wait,” Anthony is saying from behind him, tripping over himself as he tries to get up off of the floor and reach for Ian at the same time.

Ian’s entire body is on high alert. His hands are shaking with adrenaline, his heart is beating so fast in his chest he’s almost sure it will explode before this is all over.

“Don’t fucking call me,” Is all that Ian says.

He doesn’t even look over his shoulder as he swings the door closed behind him.


	8. sink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut Ian and Anthony are sitting in Anthony's apartment when pip jumps on Anthony's head pushing it onto Ian's crotch. You picking up what I'm putting down? ;)

They’re sitting on Anthony’s living room in their underwear, which is actually not the weirdest thing they’ve done lately.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard,” Ian says, before screaming a little bit when he sees Anthony approaching rapidly from behind with three Red Shells spinning around his kart.

Anthony cackles and launches them all in succession. They slam into Ian’s car one right after another, throwing Yoshi for a tri-loop as he whips right past.

“Promises, promises,” Anthony grins, leaning across to pat Ian on the cheek as he shakes his controller, desperately trying to right himself before the remainder of the characters have a chance to get past him.

In the end Anthony comes in first, and Ian barely ranks. As the slow mo replay starts up on the TV, Anthony cracks himself up laughing when Ian gets smoked again, Yoshi flying up and out of his tiny Mario kart.

“You’re gonna pay for that,” Ian promises, stretching up and reaching back to feel around for his phone on the sofa. “What time did we order the food? If they’re gonna be here soon I should probably put some pants on.”

Anthony shakes his head and reaches for Pip as he jumps from his cat post onto the back of the couch. He’s the worst cat ever, doesn’t play with any of the toys Anthony bought him; instead he enjoys climbing up into spots he can’t get down from, and attacking Anthony from under the bed as he walks by.

“It hasn’t been that long,” Anthony says, as Ian flips his phone on and checks the time. As Ian is still stretching, Anthony reaches over and pinches his nipple. When Ian squawks and covers his nipple with his hand, Anthony raises his eyebrows and grins, “What?”

Ian smacks Anthony away and says, “I’m seriously going to kill you. What the hell is Pip doing?”

“What?” Anthony asks, looking up at where Ian is staring. When he can’t immediately see Pip, he twists around the other way, awkwardly turning to look over his shoulder.

Sure enough Pip has balanced himself on one of the high beams in the ceiling, and is staring at the two of them on the floor as he crouches low and wiggles his butt.

“I think he’s gonna - ” Ian starts to say, as Pip launches himself off of the beam.

He’s on a trajectory right to Anthony’s head, and with horrifying accuracy, he makes his goal. He smokes Anthony in the side of the head with a thump, and makes him fall over into Ian just from the force alone.

“What the fuck,” Ian is laughing, watching Pip sprint away as Anthony half laughs and half groans into Ian’s lap. Still watching Pip run away, tail up in the air like he’s on a hunt, he snickers again and runs his fingers through Anthony’s hair. “Did that hurt? It didn’t sound great.”

Anthony groans and fully lets himself fall into Ian’s lap, laughing a bit as he brings his hand up and feels the side of his head, “It wasn’t awesome. Am I bleeding?”

“Not yet,” Ian grins, still petting Anthony’s head. “Although while you’re down there...”

That makes Anthony roll to the side and blush, a wide grin on his face as he stares up at Ian. He’s pretty much the only fully grown man Ian has ever known who can turn red at the drop of a hat, cheeks lighting up like fireworks.

“I guess I do kind of owe you,” Anthony admits, reaching up to touch Ian’s hair as he feels Ian’s hand start to coast up and down his side. “What’s the payback for three red shells?”

Ian grins and adjusts his position, pushing his hips out so he can lean back against the front of the couch. Prime position for getting his underwear off, he thinks, happily.

“I don’t know exactly,” He admits, already starting to get a little hard as Anthony reaches up for his waistband. “But it definitely starts with a blowjob before the food comes.”


	9. running in circles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ian and Anthony are caught making out at a smosh party and they forget all about everything that happened that night because they were drunk. The next day Joven accidentally asks anthony about it. (You are such a good writer uwu)

“Have you seen Ian?” Joven asks, a drink in each hand as he walks up to a group of people he doesn’t recognize with Mari in the center.

She laughs at him, and for a second Joven thinks he’s totally missed the joke until she points over his shoulder and then arches her eyebrows in the same direction when he doesn’t immediately get the hint.

Frowning, he finally turns around and tries to follow the line that leads to the spot her finger is pointing in.

“What the fuck?” He blurts, vocabulary totally out the window as he focuses in on Ian. Mari starts laughing even harder, like seeing their bosses making out is the funniest, most natural thing in the world.

Across the room, Anthony is in Ian’s lap on the couch. To be fair Joven can tell they’re totally fucking wasted, even from here. To be not fair, Joven could never be wasted enough where he’d accidentally start making out with one of his dude friends.

“I thought they were gonna wait to make their big announcement,” Mari grins, shrugging again as her boyfriend comes up to the group and Mari reaches forward, grabbing his hand. “Guess the shots of whiskey changed that plan.”

Joven, a little at loss for words, nods for lack of anything better to do.

He feels like a dirty old man but he totally can’t stop staring. Ian and Anthony are not just making out, they’re being totally fucking obscene. Joven can see Anthony’s hips grinding low and slow against Ian’s lap from here, and if Ian gets his hands any further down Anthony’s pants he’s almost sure there will be penetration.

“I, uh,” Joven finally says, recovering. “Nevermind. I’ll... I’ll just talk to him tomorrow, instead.”

*

The next morning they have an early call time. Joven is a little bleary eyed from the lack of sleep and one too many drinks, but he can only imagine how Ian and Anthony are feeling.

When he walks into the writer’s meeting room, he’s almost surprised to see them sitting there like it’s just a normal day.

“Morning,” He greets, laughing a little bit when Ian immediately groans and drops his forehead on the table.

Still grinning, Joven walks around to the other side of the table, and then slides his bagel onto the flat surface.

“Let’s make this as quick as possible,” Anthony adds, head propped up against one hand. “I feel like I might actually be dying.”

Joven kicks his chair out and sits down, not really thinking about it before he says, “You guys were pretty entertaining last night.”

“How so?” Ian asks, looking genuinely confused as he eyes Joven’s coffee.

Raising one eyebrow, Joven starts to crack into his bagel as Anthony sets up his MacBook, eyeing them both warily over the top edge of the screen.

“Seriously?” Joven asks, unable to contain the surprised tone in his voice. He pulls his two bagel halves apart, and says, “You two basically performed live softcore porn in front of... you know. A few people.”

Ian’s mouth drops open, quiet shock taking over his face as Anthony blushes and then frowns, running a hand through his hair.

“And what exactly do you mean?” Ian asks, trying to clarify.

Taking a bite of his bagel, Joven looks between the two curiously.

“You seriously don’t remember? How fucking drunk were you?” He asks, chewing and swallowing before he explains, “By the time I found you guys, you were both wasted and riding each other like... well, I don’t have a good comparison right now but it was seriously aggressive.”

Anthony drops his head into his hands and says, “Oh my god.”

“I think I’m gonna throw up,” Ian adds, miserably, reaching for his bottle of water.


	10. the most magical place on earth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Comedy. Ian and Anthony decide to travel to Paris, to celebrate their 1st anniversary. Both of them get drunk and they share a hot night in their hotel room.On the next day they visit Disneyland, but because of his stupidity (and the headache he had from the drinking), Ian gets lost in the crowd and does his best to find Anthony.

“Stop falling over,” Ian moans, half laughing as he leans forward to reach for Anthony again, trying to hold him by the torso to steady his balance.

In front of him on the bed, Anthony rests his forehead on his wrists and shakes his head, groaning a little as he bounces against the expensive hotel linens, voice jerking in the same rhythm as Ian’s hips, “You’re fucking me off the bed. I’m drunk.”

“So am I,” Ian agrees, sounding pretty happy about it as he adjusts his grip on Anthony’s hips and leans forward, draping himself over Anthony’s back. The change in angle makes Anthony groan again as he reaches backwards, smacking the side of Ian’s hip with his hand.

Ian grunts and pushes Anthony down into the mattress, laughing breathlessly as he bites at the back of Anthony’s neck and says, “You’re so bossy.”

*

The next morning they’re sightseeing, despite the hangovers that have them both operating at less than optimal levels.

“My petite mon chouchou,” Anthony is saying, half sidetracked by the freely roaming Disney characters as they walk down the path that leads to the French version of the Indiana Jones ride.

Ian has no idea how rides are going to mix with their semi-violent hangovers, but that was something that only time would be able to tell.

He’s about to turn around and tell Anthony that maybe they should just stick to food and souvenir shopping until they’re a little less dehydrated, when he realizes that Anthony is no longer beside him.

“Where the fuck,” Ian murmurs to himself, turning around in a slow circle to see if there was a stand that Anthony had wandered off to.

It’s overcast so he kind of feels like an idiot for wearing sunglasses, but the glare off of all of the decorations is just making him feel all kinds of terrible in the brain. Looking like an American douchebag is a risk that he’s willing to run if it means that he doesn’t end up with a pressure headache in the bridge of his nose.

“Seriously,” He sighs to himself, moving through the crowd. “Anthony? Anthony.”

He has no idea where the fuck Anthony got off to so quickly. Ian searches through the crowd - he’s too short, that dude is actually a lady, that kid with the same brown hair is a small child... He quickly comes to the realization that he could differ Anthony from probably about every other person on earth by the back of his head, which is a bit of a weird conclusion to come to about anyone at all.

“What the hell are you doing?” Anthony says from behind him.

Ian spins around to find Anthony standing there, staring at Ian like he’s the one that wandered off.

“I’m looking for you,” Ian bitches, feeling a little bit stupid as he reaches for Anthony’s hand and points towards a churro stand just up the way. “I’m going to have to put a bell on you.”

Grinning, Anthony falls into step beside him and says, “You know, I wouldn’t exactly hate that.”


	11. i would never let you down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Suggestions? Category: Smut, Ian is terribly afraid of the dark, So when the lights go out Anthony finds an interesting way of calming him down (; Thanks :D!

“Are you serious right now?” Anthony asks, as Ian startles again and twists around against the mattress, shifting until his back is against Anthony and he’s staring out at the pitch black room.

Blinking owlishly into nothing at all, Ian frowns and answers, “No I’m just fucking around, I enjoy having a heart rate of 120 and feeling like I’m about to die.”

To his credit, Anthony does sound genuinely apologetic as he says, “Sorry.”

“I hate the dark, it’s shitty,” Ian continues, reaching backwards to grab Anthony’s arm again and pull it around his middle. “Don’t move away from me.”

That makes Anthony laugh a little, as the scared tone of Ian’s voice is overtaken by the demanding one he knows so well. He settles back in, wrapping his arm tightly around Ian’s waist, and resting his mouth against the curve of Ian’s shoulder. He can feel Ian’s heart beating through his chest and it does actually feel like it’s doing double time.

“Do you want to go to a hotel?” Anthony asks softly, pressing his lips against Ian’s bare shoulder a few times. He fucking loves the dark. He’s always found it deliciously intimate, to be this close to someone when you can’t see anything at all. 

It took a lot of trust, and Anthony had that for Ian in spades.

“No,” Ian says quietly, shaking his head. He turns his face into the pillow and tries to calm his heart rate by taking a few deep breaths. “It’s fine. I’m stupid, it’s fine.”

Anthony frowns into the darkness and then pushes himself up onto his elbow, so he’s looming over Ian’s side.

“You’re not stupid,” Anthony says quietly, using his hand to fumble around for Ian’s face in the darkness. He feels his cheek and uses that as a touchstone to lean in and kiss him properly. They kiss for a few moments before Anthony presses one last one against Ian’s bottom lip and admits, “I feel pretty manly right now.”

That makes Ian snort a laugh.

“Yeah well, next time you see a spider or a silverfish you’ll have this conversation to think about before you throw my jacket at it and text me to come home,” He says, sounding more like himself.

Anthony grins into the darkness and reaches down, pinching Ian’s side.

“That was one time,” He says, but it doesn’t matter. The fight has already begun. His pinch results in Ian reaching up to tickle his sides, which is basically like kryptonite. The fact that Ian gets a perfect shot in the dark is total bullshit.

Pretty soon the blankets have been totally kicked off and Ian has forgot about the dark all together as he sits on Anthony’s stomach, the clear winner.

“What’s my reward,” Ian taunts, still tickling Anthony every time Anthony tries to reach for him in some kind of vain attempt to throw Ian’s weight off. Every now and then Ian also gets a pinch to Anthony’s nipples, which is really more of a treat for him than to irritate Anthony.

Anthony is laughing helplessly, trying to buck his hips up as he smacks Ian’s hands away and twists against the mattress.

“Anything, anything,” He pleads, still laughing as Ian finally relents and leans forward, going for a celebratory kiss.


	12. go go juice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I guess it's my turn again so... Prompt: Category: angst/fluff Ian and Anthony finally decide to tell the truth about A Day In The Life of Smosh, the one question is how can you tell the truth when you don't know what the truth is? (Triggers: implied drunk blackouts and it's supposed be like they remember having sex but they don't remember whose come it is on the poster)

They’re sitting in Anthony’s apartment filming another Lunchtime episode.

Strangely enough, they’ve been in a really fucking good groove lately. Everything has been coming up Milhouse the last couple of months; Ian doesn’t remember the last time he’s been so satisfied with his daily life.

“Are there any questions that are actually normal?” Ian asks, poking around his burrito bowl with his fork. The camera has been set down on the table top for now, as Anthony scrolls through the endless Twitter feed of inane questions.

Sometimes that’s what took the longest: finding questions that were SFL.

“We should start planting fake questions,” Anthony grins, looking over the top edge of his phone at Ian. Ian feels his stupid heart throw up all over his ribcage when Anthony looks at him like that. “Unless you want to pretend we’re cats? What the fuck?”

Ian laughs, reaching for his napkin as Anthony finally gets a few questions screencapped.

“Hand me the camera,” Ian says, holding his hand out and wiggling his fingers until Anthony picks the piece of equipment up and places it in his hand. “Okay, go for it.”

Anthony launches into the Twitter song, and Ian half pays attention and half picks at his burrito bowl. The first question is asking about the new members of the crew, and the second question is a request for more pet photos, which Ian assumes Anthony will edit some Daisy-and-Pip photos into in post production.

It’s the last question that really catches Ian off-guard.

“Alright, and their question is: what really happened in the original A Day In The Life of Smosh?” Anthony asks, eyebrows arching up as he grins a little bit and then looks across at Ian for his reaction. “That’s a little bit vague.”

Ian feels a little nervous despite himself, and thinks about cutting the camera so he can vet a better question - but then Anthony is talking, and it’s better to just let it roll.

*

“There was definitely Malibu mixed in with that Mountain Dew,” Anthony grins, staring into the camera lens. “You remember that? The next morning you had to puke out my bedroom window so my mom didn’t find out.”

Ian snorts off-camera, and replies, “Ugh. Sorry, Anthony’s mom.”

“Sorry mom,” Anthony parrots, before he adds, “There are still a lot of questions about that poster and its... contents.”

Flipping the camera around, Ian raises his eyebrows and makes a noise before he says, “Delicious.”

“Oh my god,” Anthony laughs, covering his face with one hand as they both dissolve into laughter.

When the video picks back up, it’s pretty obvious they had to cut for at least a few minutes. The sun is at a different angle on Anthony’s face.

“I don’t uh... actually remember exactly how that got there,” Ian says, sounding a little more honest than he’d anticipated as he focuses the camera back in on Anthony, still sitting across the table and watching him fondly. “My memory ends at about 9PM that night.”

Anthony smiles, still looking at Ian over the camera, and adds, “Mountain Dew and Malibu, man. Not only a delicious combination, but a real relationship starter, as well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> request yours at baeian.tumblr.com :D


	13. doctor doctor i've been losing my patience

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggested Prompt Category: Angst/ fluff Ian is terribly afraid of the dark and accidentally locked himself in the bathroom while the powers off. It's up to Anthony to try and save him.

"Alright just stop freaking out!" Anthony yells, a little panicked himself as he tries to twist the doorknob again. "Are you sure it’s unlocked?!"

Ian, on the other side of the door, has no fucking idea if he’s sure it’s unlocked. He’s so riddled with panic and adrenaline that at this point he probably wouldn’t be able so spell out I-A-N if you asked him to.

"I’m pretty sure I’m dying!" Ian calls, instead of answering Anthony’s question. He sounds a little bit crazy as he makes a weird noise and tries to pound on the door again.

Anthony has always been fucking terrible in an emergency situation. He immediately goes from calm and collected to anxious and illogical: like, right now for example, all that he can think about is breaking down the door.

"I’m going to break it down," Anthony says through the door, blinking cautiously into the darkness.

The only light he has to work with is coming through the windows in the living room, but it’s 10PM at night and even on the best of days they don’t get sunlight in this hallway.

"What?!" Ian squawks, which is the last thing Anthony hears before his own body slams up against his side of the door.

This is really a job for Ian, he thinks to himself, cringing as he takes a few steps back and starts running at the door again. Anthony might have more muscles but Ian had the general mass to knock shit down. Anthony’s body was basically for display; like Britney Spears in 2001.

"What are you doing?!" Ian calls again, and through the door Anthony can hear the sound of the shower curtain rings scraping against the rod.

Anthony slams into the door one more time and it finally cracks. The lock stays fully locked in the frame, but the rest of the door bursts through it. He stumbles in after it, not feeling as cool as he thought he would when he accidentally catches one arm against the splintered side of the frame and swears loudly.

"What the fuck!" Ian shouts, from where he’s standing in the tub holding onto the shower curtain.

Grimacing, Anthony holds onto the scraped side of his arm with one hand and staggers forward into the darkness, making his way towards Ian.

"Doors open," He says, as Ian climbs out of the tub and reaches for his arm. "Now help me find the band aids."


	14. all of my love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suggested Prompt Category: Fluff/Smut Ian and Anthony are on vacation and are having some 'fun' while looking back on how far they've come and how proud they are of eachother for there channel to hit 20,000,000 subscribers

"Holy shit," Ian swears, knocking his glass against the side of his plate as he sets it back down on the table.

Anthony, across the table, raises his eyebrows and takes another bite of his salad.

"Dude, look," Ian laughs, holding his phone out over the table, screen towards Anthony.

As Anthony chews his food he reads the email Ian’s pulled up, face going from confused to surprised to excited.

"Twenty mil?" He asks, eyebrows arching as he stares at Ian still looking back at him from across the table.

Ian grins and shrugs, looking pretty proud of himself as he whips a response back to their channel manager.

"I can’t even wrap my head around that," He admits, setting his phone back down against the table before reaching for his fork.

His favorite part about any vacation besides the sex, is the food. One day into this trip, he hasn’t been disappointed.

"You wanna give me a celebratory blowjob under the table?" Anthony asks, grinning from ear to ear. At Ian’s frown, he raises his eyebrows and asks, "Handjob?"

Ian leans back against his chair and reaches for his drink, looking thoughtful before he takes a sip and answers, “When we get back to the hotel I’ll eat your ass on the balcony.”

"Fuck," Anthony blurts, a knee jerk reaction when Ian talks like that. He feels his face get hot as he grins back at Ian and says, raising one hand in the air, "Let’s get one more round and get the fuck out of here."


	15. apple juice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My turn! Prompt: Type: Romance/Smut. Ian and Anthony just finished shooting the 3rd Whisper Challenge video. Ian asks his best friend is it true what he said earlier: that he loves him. Anthony laughs, but Ian is serious. You decide what will happen next! ^^

"Dude, that one got weird," Ian laughs, as Anthony unplugs the headphones from his iPhone. "We’re going to have to edit half of that shit out."

Anthony grins and gives him a curious look as he makes his way around the table, over to where they’d left their beers on the kitchen island.

"What do you mean?" He asks, snagging the bottles as Pip jumps up onto the counter.

Looking dubious, Ian raises his eyebrows and asks, “I love apple juice and I love you?”

"That’s what I thought you said!" Anthony says, defending himself even though it’s pretty obvious he’s a little embarrassed. His shoulders have gone all tight into his ears, and he’s started to blush a little bit.

Ian rolls his eyes but accepts his beer as Anthony comes back to the kitchen table.

"Don’t say that shit to me unless you mean it," He jokes, lilting his voice until it doesn’t sound serious.

Inside he’s jangling around like a plastic bag full of bottle caps.

"I meant it," Anthony says. He’s gone back to leaning against the kitchen counter, leaving Ian to feel worlds away from his spot at the table.

Ian frowns and looks at his beer bottle for a second before he reconsiders and says, “I don’t know exactly what you mean.”

"Apple juice is my faaaaavorite," Anthony teases, rolling his eyes and sounding like a total brat before he laughs a little and becomes serious again. "It came out before I could stop it, but I meant it."

Considering this, Ian thumbs his beer bottle label before he says, “There was way too much flirting in that video.”

That makes Anthony laugh, throwing his head back as he starts to walk back over to the table. He doesn’t stop until he’s standing at the side in front of Ian, who is staring back up at him.

" I will flirt with you for as long as you let me," He says, honestly.

When Ian looks back five years later, he will realize that’s where it all started.


	16. the stench the stench of summer sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Fluff After the whisper challenge Ian wants to dance like Uma Thurman, except to Anthony's gay club music. While he's dancing Anthony gets a little gay himself. (Warnings: dry humping) idk if this is ok, but I'd really like to see you write it

They’re done filming for the night so they move to the living room, a couple of mixed drinks between them and HBO on the TV.

"I have that stupid fucking song stuck in my head,” Ian laughs, tipping his head back against the couch as Anthony steps over him, enroute to the other side of the sofa with a bag of banana chips. “And I think it gave me high blood pressure.”

Anthony cackles as he falls into the sofa, reaching for the television remote with one hand as the other tries to fend Pip away from his open bag of chips.

“Everything gives you high blood pressure,” Anthony says, half smiling as he gets the PVR Guide open. He’s in the mood for something specific but he isn’t sure what it is yet. All he knows is that he doesn’t want to indulge Ian’s gross fetish for Game of Thrones any further. “Don’t blame that on my sexy music.”

Laughing, Ian rolls his head against the back of the couch and holds one hand out, wiggling his fingers towards Anthony’s chip bag.

“Give me some,” He commands, as Anthony flips through all of the higher channels.

Anthony smacks Ian’s hand away as best he can as he navigates through the channels, yelping when Ian starts jabbing at him instead, poking at his sides in attempt to break his iron grip on the chips.

“I’m going to put it on more gay club music until your blood pressure spikes and you have a heart attack,” Anthony threatens, turning it onto one of the radio channels. Sure enough, Eclectic Electronica! is already throwing down some steamy remixes. “Here we go, it’s starting.”

Grinning, Ian shakes his head and then pouts until Anthony finally drops a handful of banana chips into his palm. Ian doesn’t even want the banana chips but he’s had a weird taste in his mouth since dinner.

“Thank you,” He says, placidly, as Anthony shoves a handful into his own mouth, foot bouncing against the coffee table in beat with the music. “This music makes me want to kill someone and then have sex with you on their corpse.”

Anthony bursts out laughing, looking over at Ian fondly as he shakes his head, swallows, and reaches for his drink. That was the kind of shit you could only say out loud to someone you’d known for 15 years.

“Let’s do it,” Anthony announces, setting his drink down on the coffee table and then bouncing up from the sofa. He stands beside it, clapping his hands and wiggling his hips as Ian raises an eyebrow, apparently not into it. “Come on, get up.”

Still looking unsure, Ian crunches on the last banana chip and says, “I don’t know, I don’t really feel like committing murder right now…”

“We’re not committing murder, just get up,” Anthony says, reaching forward to grab Ian by the arms. 

Anthony was like the most annoying person on earth when he wanted something. He was as strong-headed as a bull and way more resilient. Ian’s had standoffs that have lasted well into three hours before he was the one who finally broke just to put a stop to Anthony’s chant of Ian, Ian, Ian, Ian, babe, babe, babe, babe.

“Alright, alright, jesus,” Ian sighs, pretending to be put out as he stands up, pulling his shirt down at the front and knocking all of the banana chip crumbs off. “What are we doing?”

It’s a little underwhelming when Anthony just bends down and grabs the television remote again. Ian has no idea what he’s doing until the surround sound clicks on, and then the thump, thump, thump starts vibrating through his chest. His heart feels like it’s begun to beat in a different rhythm.

“Dance with me,” Anthony says, even though Ian only hears half of it through the wub of the music.

Ian’s a little bit skeptical until Anthony reaches forward and grabs his hips, leaving one hand on his side as the other comes up to the back of his head. Basically Ian can get on board with anything that includes his dick, and this definitely seems like it’s headed there.

The song doesn’t seem to end. They just move with it, standing between Anthony’s coffee table and sofa, until the air between them gets a little bit sticky and Ian’s boner is edging on this side of uncomfortable. Anthony has got his mouth on the side of Ian’s kick, kissing and sucking as they grind against each other in rhythm to the music.

When the song finally fades into a commercial for digital radio, Ian is pretty much sold on any and all gay club music now or forever in the future.

They fall into the couch on top of one another as the next set starts up, and for the entire week following, Ian can’t get the beat out of his head.


	17. its just a party, janet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Fluff Plot: Ian and Anthony are hosting a party at their house, to celebrate Smosh's 20,000,000 subscribers. The whole crew is there: Mari, Lasercorn, Jovenshire, Flitz, Olivia and etc. Everyone is intoxicated from drinking lots of booze and they decide to play Spin The Bottle.

“I played this when I was like twelve,” Olivia complains, even though she’s already moving to sit down on the floor. Everyone has kind of gathered around tonight in a half-assed circle; Flitz and Mari up on the couch, Lasercorn sitting on the edge of the coffee table, and everyone else on the floor.

Anthony comes back into the living room from the porch, hoodie thrown on and unzipped, his leftover roach pinched between two fingers.

“Wait what are we doing?” He asks, walking over to the fireplace to set the butt of his joint into the little box he kept there for such purposes. 

As he walks back towards the group, Wes slides the porch door back open and slips in from outside.

“Spin the bottle,” Ian answers from where he’s sitting on the floor. He doesn’t sound very happy about it, legs kicked out in front of him as he leans back against the bottom of the couch and sips on his beer.

Grinning, Anthony walks over to the group and drops down on the floor beside Ian, elbowing him a little bit as he asks, “Jealous?”

“So jealous of you potentially making out with not only our mutual friends, but also our employees,” Ian nods, which makes Mari crack up. “Can we all agree that no sexual harassment lawsuits are going to be filed as a result of this strange turn of events?”

Flitz raises his eyebrows and reaches for the bottle, spinning it before anyone else has a chance to. He announces, “I’m gonna get my lawsuit money. I’m gonna be Oprah rich.”

“Ahh!” Anthony yells, when he zones into the bottle and realizes that it’s landed on him.

Everyone else cracks up, catcalling and making “woohoo” noises as Ian groans and buries his face in his hands.

“Come get it,” Flitz says, leaning forward a bit off of the coffee table.

Laughing, Anthony rolls out of his crosslegged position and onto his hands and knees. He shuffles his way across the living room floor until he’s in front of Flitz, and makes a kissy face in the most dramatic way possible; raising his eyebrows up and pouting his lips out like a fish.

“Who can resist that?!” Jovenshire cracks up, nodding a thank you to Wes when he comes to the circle with a few extra beers to replace the near empties.

Flitz and Anthony kiss, it isn’t particularly hot or steamy, and everyone laughs as Anthony falls back into his spot and Flitz continues to joke about getting in on some kind of sexual harassment moneygrab.

It’s actually more entertaining than everyone had originally anticipated. Olivia ends up refusing to kiss Lasercorn on account of his hair, and Ian accepts a double cheek kiss from both Mari and Jovenshire due to the potential cross-contamination of the bottle angle.

Everything goes well until Anthony spins the bottle and basically 180s it, so it perfectly lines up with Ian’s feet.

“Aaaaand here’s where things get weird,” Ian announces, as everyone in the group cracks up and starts whistling, catcalling and singing ‘bow chica wow wow’ bass lines.

It’s not like they haven’t kissed in front of everyone before, but they’ve kept it to more of a… professional level of intimacy, if that was something Ian could describe it as. A quick kiss in exchange for coffee, an unintentional handhold when they thought nobody was paying attention, googly eyes exchanged over the conference table - you know, normal “couple in the workplace” shit.

But tonight, with everyone drunk and stoned - particularly Anthony, who had voyeuristic tendencies on a normal day, but was now completely blitzed on top of that - Ian knows they’re not gonna get away with a quick peck.

“I’m gonna kiss my man,” Anthony announces, using his sassy black lady voice as he crawls back up onto his knees and shuffles the half arms length that had been between them.

Ian rolls his eyes but lets it happen. Everyone is either cracking up with laughter or cheering them on as Anthony grabs his face and places the sloppiest, wettest, most disgusting kiss in history on his mouth. He tastes like weed and the smoothie he was joking about pouring tequila into earlier.

Ultimately though, he tastes like Anthony and Ian only has so much control before that wins out over everything.

He reaches up and holds Anthony steady so they can kiss properly, long and drawn out until the cheering just turns into a round of applause.

“Impressive form,” Mari is saying, nodding her head and holding up a pretend scorecard.

Anthony does a quick bow before shuffling back into his original position. And honestly, Ian can’t shake the smile off his face for the rest of the night.


	18. tell me when you're gonna let me in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut (I guess...) Back in days when Ian and Anthony lived together. Anthony having sex with a girl while Ian sitting in his room pretending he doesn't hear any noise. In the moment of climax Anthony screams Ian's name, and Ian wants to talk about it. Fluff or angst in the end - you decide :)

Oh my god, Ian thinks, a little hysterical as he tries to press his pillow over his head. Whether he’s trying to block the noise or just suffocate himself is up in the air as he hears Anthony’s bed frame hit the wall in the other room, and then the now familiar sound of moaning.

“What the fuck,” He whispers to himself, flipping the pillow off his face and then yanking the blankets up over his head.

It makes pretty much no difference. He can still hear the rhythmic thumping and the sound of Anthony’s groans through the walls. It’s like being stuck in purgatory or something, being so close to the sound of something that he wants, without actually being able to touch it.

Ian exhales, tries to clear his mind, and opens his eyes.

This is fine, he thinks to himself, as Anthony finally stops groaning. He can hear the bed frame banging, still, but that’s okay. He can manage with furniture bumping up against the wall; it’s gotta be over soon, anyways.

It’s pretty obvious when it happens. One second Ian is laying there, trying not to count the number of times the bed thumps against the wall, and the second his stomach is twisting up into his throat. He swears he hears Anthony say, “fuck, fuck, fuck,” which is fine, and then, “fuck, Ian, fuck,” which is not.

On a positive note, both the thumping and the groaning stops.

Ian is totally frozen in bed. He can’t figure out if what he heard was real, or if it was just his sleep addled brain playing tricks on him. Maybe it was like when you saw a lake in the middle of the sahara: your body’s idea of a shitty prank.

Now he can’t stop straining to listen. He can’t hear much, but he can hear the low murmur of conversation. Anthony says “no” a few times, a bit of a panicked lilt to his voice, before his bedroom door opens and Ian listens to the sound of feet in the hallway.

The feet lead all the way to the front door and then it opens and closes.

Ian rolls over and falls asleep when he hears Anthony walk from the front door, back into his own room.

*

The next morning Ian is understandably a little awkward over breakfast.

He isn’t sure how to bring it up, or if he even should, which is probably why the words fall out of his mouth at the most inopportune time.

“Did you say my name when you were fucking that girl?” Ian asks, and Anthony immediately spills half a carton of orange juice all over the counter.

Anthony goes red from the bottom of his neck to the top of his cheekbones. He fumbles with the OJ, which is basically the same thing as saying ‘yes, yes I did come while screaming your name,’ and tries not to look Ian in the eyes.

“It’s like,” Ian starts to say, but then inevitably trails off when he isn’t sure where to take the sentence. “It’s fine.”

Still fumbling and flushing, Anthony shakes his head and tries to mop up the spilled juice. He says, “I didn’t. I didn’t… I don’t know, but it wasn’t you.”

“Alright,” Ian says, even though he can tell Anthony is lying through his teeth.

The next time it happens, Ian corners him in the bathroom the same night. This time, he doesn’t give Anthony the chance to deny it.


	19. at least we stole the show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Fluff Ian has been dreaming. Dreaming of one particular thing lately, Anthony. He had dreamt many things about Anthony, many things he wishes would come to life, but how will he react when one of the dreams does. (Basically his dream of Anthony telling him "I love you" has come true)

When Ian was 17, the dreams started.

He remembers the first one he had vividly; could look back on it now with an almost bittersweet taste in his mouth. He and Anthony had been in a record store they’d used to visit all the time; for some reason Ian’s childhood dog had been there, too. That was the first time he ever had a dream about Anthony.

In the ten years that followed, the dreams had become more intricate, more elaborate. Real life couldn’t give him what he wanted, but when he closed his eyes his subconscious could.

He could create entire stories in his head, about himself and Anthony.

The day he turns 27, Anthony asks him to be one of the best men in his wedding. Ian smiles and says “yes” and goes to bed that night, dreaming about an alternate universe where he and Anthony drive up and down the Pacific Coast Highway all summer.

A few months later, Anthony’s break-up surprises him. He’s genuinely caught off guard, eyes going wide as Anthony finally breaks and falls into him in a hug, clutching at Ian’s back like he hasn’t had the chance to split into pieces yet.

It takes a month, two, almost three before the truth comes out. One day they’re sitting there, and nothing has changed. The next, Anthony freaks him out by saying, “I have to tell you something.”

Ian thinks Anthony is going to say he’s breaking his part of their development contract. Maybe he’s going to move to India and become one of those vegans that live in the mountains for lack of anything better to do. If Kalel took him back, maybe they were going to move to Sacramento and settle down.

The last thing Ian is expecting Anthony to say is, “I need you to know that I love you.”

He feels like the wind has been knocked out of him. Every night that separates his teenaged self from his current self comes rumbling back to life, creating this monster that is bigger than he and Anthony combined.

“Me too,” Ian blurts, unable to shake the daydream. His heart is high in his throat and he laughs nervously, unable to be a normal person as he adds, “I am so scared right now.”

That makes Anthony laugh, too - and a lot of things have changed, but that’s one thing that Ian knows will sound the same until the day he dies. They sit there, staring at each other stupidly, unsure of what to do next.


	20. i wanna go on ellen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: category: fluff. Ian got his wisdom teeth out and is totally out of it due to the morphine. Anthony is assigned carer until he can function properly. Bonus; he smashes a cup and starts crying because he's so fucked

HAHAH I LOVE THIS PROMPT SO MUCH

 

*

“Okay just... stop grabbing that,” Anthony says, trying to reach across the car and untangle the seatbelt from where Ian’s twisted it around one of his hands.

Ian’s in the passenger seat, sunglasses half knocked off his face as he reaches for the seatbelt buckle again. He’s been talking nonsense since they left the dentist’s office fifteen minutes ago; the nurse had warned Anthony the drugs affected certain people in “funny” ways, but nothing she had said would have prepared him for this.

It had taken ten minutes just to get out of the building the dentist’s office was in. Every time Ian took a step he’d flip out and start talking about the pot lights that were lining the hallways. He had to touch every one individually before he’d allowed Anthony to lead him down the hall and into the elevator.

The elevator had been the water world level of Ian’s journey from dentist chair to passenger seat. Even though Anthony was holding one of his hands, he’d taken the one moment Anthony was sidetracked with Googling return directions on his phone to slam his free palm into all of the other floor buttons.

They’d gone from floor to floor individually, Ian panicking every single time the door opened, until they’d finally reached the lobby. Of course Ian assumed the lobby was hell, and had refused to get out until Anthony had put his own sunglasses on Ian’s face and led him out.

Now, in the car, he’s obsessed with the seat belt. He can’t stop talking about the seat belt and how he’d like to be Kanye West for a day.

“Alright,” Anthony says, mostly to himself as he eases the car out of its parking spot.

Thank god everyone only has to get their wisdom teeth removed once because he is never doing this again.

*

At home, Anthony gets Ian set up on the couch with a glass of water and a bottle of Gatorade.

“Look, orange, it’s your favorite,” Anthony says, cracking the lid and holding it out for Ian to take. “You gotta get your liquids.”

In a rare moment of clarity, normal Ian breaks through and he laughs, saying, “I know some other liquids I can get.”

“Maybe when your mouth isn’t stuffed with gauze and medicine,” Anthony offers, placidly, holding the bottle out again. “Here you go.”

Ian takes the bottle, not looking too happy about it, and brings it up to his mouth to take a sip. As he’s sidetracked with that, Anthony takes the opportunity to turn the TV on and settle into the couch beside him. At first he thought he might be able to get some writing done or something, but in reality it’s more like a babysitting gig. Babysitting his boyfriend. Worst Tuesday ever.

“What do you want to watch?” Anthony asks, as he flips the TV over to Netflix.

Unsteadily screwing the lid back onto his bottle, Ian says, “Clueless. Not the movie, the tv show. I love that bitch.”

“Alright,” Anthony laughs. He has no idea if that’s even something that exists on Netflix, but he’ll at least try.

Ian leans forward and sets his Gatorade on the table, and then reaches for his glass of water instead. Anthony sees it happening out of the corner of his eye, but it goes down too quickly for him to do anything about it. Once second he’s looking for the TV version of Cher Horowitz, and the next Ian’s glass of water is falling off of the table and exploding against the hardwood floor.

Of course what Anthony doesn’t expect in this situation is for Ian to start crying the second he realizes the glass is broken.

“What the fuck!” He cries, trying to lurch forward off of the couch despite the blanket and pillows Anthony had piled around him. Like a small child, he’d thought at the time. “The water can’t save itself, oh my god.”

He sounds so distraught that Anthony can’t help but accidentally laugh as he gets up off of the couch, dropping the television remote onto the coffee table before reaching for Ian’s shoulders to try and push him back into the cushions.

“It’s fine, everything’s fine,” He says, even though his voice is a little warbly with laughter. “I’m going to get a towel. Don’t touch it.”

Ian can’t contain himself, he covers his face with his hands and cries as Anthony jogs over to the kitchen counter to grab a towel and something to put the broken glass in.

“It needs me to touch it,” Ian is saying, even though he’s still so beside himself he hasn’t tried to move yet. “That glass! The water, oh my god. This is so fucked up.”

Still trying to hide his laughter, Anthony comes back with an empty cereal box and a towel. He picks the pieces of the glass up, tosses them into the cardboard box, and then mops up the water as best he can with one towel.

“There we go, all fixed,” He says, even though the floor is still wet and he’s pretty sure some hidden pieces of glass probably exploded somewhere.

Ian’s calmed down a little, but he’s still pretty torn up about the wasted life of the glass. He groans and says, “That fucked me up. What happened to those lights?!”

“Alright,” Anthony sighs, sitting at the edge of the coffee table. “Let’s go have a nap.”


	21. you are my fortune you are my fame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Type: Cute/Romantic/Drama. Plot: Ian just broke up with Melanie and Anthony does his best to lighten his life up. But The bowl-haired guy is suffering from a depression and Ant has to think of something else, before Ian falls in a black hole...

“Dude, you gotta get off the couch,” Anthony says, standing in the middle of the living room. 

Ian hasn’t opened up any of the curtains today, which leaves a weird, almost grey sheen over everything. Add the current lighting to the stack of pizza boxes on the floor and the empty beer bottles on the table, and the whole thing looked pretty sad in a “starting your life over in your mid 20s” type of way.

“I’m not getting off the couch,” Ian announces, eyes closed.

Frowning, Anthony leans against the door frame for a minute. Debates opening all of the windows up and forcing Ian to join the land of the living again - but, ultimately, shrugs his shoulders and lets Ian wallow in his sadness.

*

Two months later Ian is still not really back to his usual self, and then Kalel breaks up with Anthony.

“I’m here,” Anthony announces, voice flat as he comes into the living room that Ian has been camped out in for weeks. The only time he’s left has been to shoot a video; well, now Anthony is bringing the work to him.

He sets a bottle of tequila onto the coffee table, and then drops a bag of groceries next to it.

Without saying another word he crawls into the other couch by himself, pulls the blanket up over his body until it’s up to his chin, and closes his eyes.

*

Things change slowly. It’s so minute they don’t even realize it’s happening until one day Ian wakes up and actually shaves his beard.

They’d spent the first week together drunk. Ian hadn’t had anyone to wallow in his misery with prior to now, and always considered day drinking alone to be in bad form. With Anthony, they crack a beer first thing in the morning and nurse day hangovers while eating his weird vegan food.

The second week they had watched lots of TV. Played a lot of video games. That was the week Ian willingly finally opened the curtains.

Weeks two and three had slid by slowly. They’d talked about video ideas, and Anthony had broken down once while talking about Kalel. 

After that, things just changed. It was like taking one step up the mountain every day, until they were on top of the world without even realizing it.

One day Ian just woke up and thought, you know what. Today is just another good day.


	22. TROPICO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Fluff Ian and Anthony are relaxing on the balcony during the sunset when Ian watches as Anthony takes off his shirt since its hot. He hasn't told Anthony about his feelings yet, but that's about to change. (Type of Smut: you don't have to write out a full blowjob if you don't want to, it could be like Ian grabbing Anthony's crotch) :D

“I feel like Malibu Barbie right now or something, this is fucking awesome,” Anthony grins, kicking his feet up onto the edge of the balcony railing.

On the other side of the drink cooler, Ian is grinning and leaning back into his chair with both hands rested behind his head. He feels like they’re in one of those Corona commercials, except instead of cheap beer and sand they’ve got coconuts full of liquor and ocean views.

“We gotta get you in a bikini if you want to start comparing yourself to Malibu Barbie,” Ian jokes, sliding his sunglasses off his nose and to the top of his head instead. “Alright is it just me or is it actually getting hotter now that the sun is going down?”

Anthony shakes his head and finishes sipping his drink before he answers, “I’m fucking dying. I think I got a sunburn today. Here, check it out.”

“Dude,” Ian laughs, as Anthony pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it at the railing, where their swim shorts are still hanging from earlier. “You’re... you’re definitely red.”

He looks at Anthony’s body as Anthony settles back into his lounger, awkwardly trying to get comfortable against the plastic cushions.

“It kinda hurts,” He says, wrinkling his nose.

Ian’s taking advantage of the current situation, and is now openly oogling Anthony’s body. They’re both a few drinks in, bitch can stand to get stared at a little bit, Ian thinks.

“It looks shitty,” Ian nods, eyes trailing down to where Anthony’s torso disappears into his shorts. It’s fucking appetizing, is what it is, Ian thinks to himself, as he settles back into his chair.

Goddamnit. Of all the people in the world to end up with as a best friend and business partner, why did Anthony have to be his. Why couldn’t he have met Anthony at a club somewhere when they were already in their mid-20s so he could just fuck his brains out and be done with it?

“How did you not burn?” Anthony asks, crawling back out of his chair. He heads across the small deck to the table they’d set the room service food on - mostly fruit platters for Anthony, and various Island meat-and-carby goodness for Ian. “You’re the whitest person I know.”

Ian watches Anthony’s ass as he stands in front of their food, picking at the tray of cut up strawberries and pineapple.

“You were like, baking yourself in the sun,” Ian shrugs. Anthony turns around and totally catches him staring at his ass, so he decides to just keep talking like nothing happened. “I know who my best friend is, and his name is the motherfucking shade. Umbrella, bitch.”

Grinning, Anthony picks up his coconut rum, and says, “You’re drunk.”

“Yeah,” Ian answers, grinning. “Pretty sure that’s why I’m thinking about having sex with you right now. Doesn’t sound like something I would do sober.”

To his credit, Anthony looks surprised for a moment before he recovers and raises his eyebrows, asking, “You wouldn’t fuck me sober?”

“...I probably would also fuck you sober, yeah,” Ian nods, not bothering to lie as Anthony makes his way back over from the food table. “Mostly I won’t fuck you because you’re my best friend. Not my best... boy... friend?”

Anthony laughs and sits at the edge of Ian’s chair, and smiles, “What if I ask nicely?”

“You can try,” Ian shrugs, trying to play it off.

Inside, he finally realizes what it feels like to be a teenaged girl.

*

An hour later the balcony door is wide open, white gauzy curtain caught in the island wind. The chairs are both empty, one with a deserted coconut sitting at its feet, and the other with a spilled beer in the seat.

Inside the hotel room, Anthony’s hands are twisted up into the frame of the bed headboard, fingers wrapped around the bamboo and metal. His skin is bright red, not yet golden against the white sheets.

“Fuck, I’m - fuck,” He’s breathing, almost a chant. Every time Ian thrusts into him his head bumps up against the headboard, and the breath gets puffed out of his chest. He tries to open his eyes but it doesn’t work, they just roll back as his fingers tighten again, grip twisting against the metal frame.

Ian is on top of him, hair stuck and falling in his eyes as he holds Anthony’s hips in both hands and fucks him hard, no longer wondering what it would be like to have this part of his best friend.


	23. a storm that won't wait

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ianthony established relationship prompt: they've been dating for a while but they haven't said "I love you" yet. :D please and thank you.

It’s kind of starting to get weird.

Ian isn’t sure what to do about it. Does he just blurt it out? Should he wait for a romantic moment? Should he write it down on a piece of paper to make sure the words look right before he verbally commits?

He spends a lot of time thinking about the best way to say “I love you” to Anthony, but ultimately is caught off guard one day when he says something stupid and then can’t stop laughing.

Anthony grins at him and says, “You’re insane, I love you so much.”

“You what?” Ian blurts, still laughing a little bit as the words bumble right off his tongue.

Still smiling, feathers not once ruffled in the wind, Anthony looks at him and says, “I said I love you.”

“Oh,” Ian replies, half smiling as he lets that feeling sit on his shoulders for a moment. It’s brand new, something he’s never felt before - to have anyone walk by them in this moment, and know that Anthony loves him. “I love you too.”

Anthony grins and reaches across, taking Ian’s hand and pulling it back into his lap. For the rest of the drive they sit in silence, Ian’s hand sandwiched by both of Anthony’s.


	24. even if it sounds crazy, darling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Established Relationship. Ian and Anthony were on a plane heading back from their honeymoon in the Bahamas, when Ian realizes Anthony is his sky full of stars...

“Holy shit,” Ian blurts, surprising himself at the volume of his own voice.

In the seat next to him, Anthony raises his eyebrows and looks away from the in-flight magazine he’s been reading for the last fifteen minutes. He looks a little tired, a little jet-lagged, a little perfect.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, leaning forward curiously when Ian doesn’t look away from where he’s been staring out the window.

Ian blinks a few times, watching his own reflection in the dark window. Outside, the sky is blue and black and for all intents and purposes, completely average for a 9PM flight. Inside, Ian feels like his chest is suddenly full of the planets and stars. They barely all fit in there; it almost feels impossible.

“It just hit me,” Ian finally says, shaking his head as he looks away from the window and over to where Anthony’s now looking at least a little concerned, the magazine lowered into his lap. “I never really thought about it before, but you’re the most important person in my entire life. Everything comes back to you.”

Anthony almost looks confused for a moment, his eyebrows knot before his face relaxes and he smiles, grin stretching from one side of his face to the other.

“Took you long enough,” He smiles, voice soft, before he leans over to kiss the round part of Ian’s shoulder through his t-shirt.


	25. let me see how big your mouth is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Type: Fluff/Smut. It has been a couple of weeks since Ianthony is a canon couple, but Anthony wants to already get to the 4th base with Ian. However, the bowl-haired guy is not that ready to have sex with his boyfriend and of course, Anthony gets mad at him.

They're at Anthony's place again, mostly because the majority of Ian's life is still packed into cardboard boxes five hours away.

Ian's got a thing for Anthony's hips. He can't help it, there's just some crazy animal part of his brain that loves how narrow they are, how they almost fit into both of his hands. He'd never really been a hip guy - he'd always considered himself more of an ass man - but who was he to deny his heart what it so obviously wanted.

"Let me fuck you," Anthony says, as Ian is flipping them back over and climbing on top again.

Bending forward, he balances himself with each palm pressed into the pillows on either side of Anthony's head, and leans forward, pressing his mouth against Anthony's.

Things had been getting dirty as all fuck over the last few weeks. It was like neither of them could get enough, Ian had never sent a picture of his own dick before and he sure as hell had never had interest in having sex in public. Yet here they were, fresh off a reign of boner photos and a quick fuck in the bathroom of a restaurant they could now never go back to.

Yet through it all, there's been one line Ian has pretty firmly drawn in the sand. He was willing to do almost anything, toe it, touch it, dance around it - but he wasn't prepared to cross it. Not yet.

"Fuck you," Ian breathes back, using his body weight to roll them to the side again.

Anthony rolls with him, looking a little grumpy when he winds up on top, his ass positioned pretty firmly against Ian's dick. He grinds his hips down anyways, grinning when he gets an uncontrolled groan out of Ian, and a hand against his stomach.

"I wanna come," Anthony says, continuing to grind his hips in tight little circles, stomach against the palm of Ian's hand, ass against Ian's dick.

Laughing a little bit, Ian starts to jerk Anthony off slowly, and says, "You can come. You wanna fuck, I'll fuck you."

"I wanna fuck you," Anthony groans, even though it looks like it's going to be game over in a few seconds anyways as he bucks his hips against Ian's fist, holding onto Ian's knee as he grinds down, hips following Ian's hand. "Come on."

Ian shakes his head and pushes himself up onto one elbow, speeding his fist up with the other.

"You can come on my face, you can suck my dick, you can do whatever you want to me," Ian breathes, as Anthony drops his head forward, forehead bumping against Ian's sticky shoulder as he groans and breathes heavily, trying not to come. "But you're not fucking me. Not yet."

With that he twists his hand twice more and Anthony comes, grabbing at Ian's back and groaning roughly into his shoulder.

In the morning, Ian will wake up with teeth marks lightly bruised into his skin.


	26. zoom zoom zoom zoom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Fluff/ very mild smut After the sex turban video Anthony wants to know if it really works on guys too. Ian shows him the "magic" of the sex turban and things end a little more "spicy" than anticipated

“That is one ugly hat,” Anthony comments, leaning one hip against the arm of the couch as he studies Ian sitting there, one leg crossed at the knee.

Ian looks a little affronted as he says, “It’s a turban, not a hat.”

“Sorry,” Anthony apologies, though the flat tone doesn’t exactly scream that it’s sincere. He extends his arm, and wiggles the fingers on one hand. “Let me see it.”

On the floor, Ian shakes his head and preciously picks the turban up out of his lap. He says, “Sorry, no sharesies. It’s magic, if I let you touch it, it might not work for me anymore.”

“Whatever, you know that’s all bullshit,” Anthony says, even though he still sounds a little intrigued. He leans against the couch a little harder, and watches the turban curiously as Ian holds it up. It catches the light beautifully, he thinks, and then, that’s weird. “How does it work?”

Ian shrugs and picks it up, then sits it on his head.

“I put it on,” He says, adjusting it. “Chicks can’t get enough.”

Without meaning to, Anthony lets out a little groan. It surprises both of them, Anthony’s eyes going wide as Ian stares back awkwardly.

“I didn’t mean to do that,” Anthony blurts, before jumping away from the couch awkwardly. Inside, he suddenly feels about a thousand degrees hot. “Alright, this is really weird.”

Ian looks half into it, like he’s curious but also doesn’t reeeeally want to know.

“Are you alright?” Ian asks, tone cautious.

The words are hardly fully out of his mouth before Anthony is practically falling across the room. It’s like the gravity has suddenly been switched off, and Ian is the axis Anthony is moving towards. His feet move out in front of him, hands almost floating through the air as he crosses the room.

It’s weird, and it doesn’t end until Anthony is practically dropping himself into Ian’s lap.

“I have no idea what’s happening,” Anthony has time to say, before he leans forward and licks from the collar of Ian’s shirt, up his throat, and to his adam’s apple. He whimpers, and then adds, “Oh my god.”

Well, Ian thinks, this is certainly a turn of events.


	27. ft. jason derulo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Angst After a long shoot Ian just wants to go to bed and take care of his big "problem" after staring at Anthony's hot abs all day he's more than a little worked up. That is of course until Anthony decides to help him with said "problem"

“Dude, I am like... the world isn’t even making sense to me right now,” Ian admits, scratching the top of his head. His eyes are bleary, little bags already beginning to appear under them as he stands in the middle of the living room, talking to Anthony over the heads of the audio guys.

Across the room and in the kitchen, Anthony grins and continues to slice up the box of strawberries he’s been working on for the last ten minutes.

“Go to bed,” Anthony shrugs, and to anyone else it probably sounds like the most casual suggestion ever.

But it’s deeper than that, and they both know it. The house is still riddled with crew members, writers, sound guys and video operators. If Ian goes to bed now, he’ll have to go to his own bed - everyone will notice if he goes into Anthony’s room, instead. 

Which is kind of shitty, because his pillows are on Anthony’s bed, and his knapsack is in Anthony’s closet. All that’s left in his old room is the weird wooden framed bed and a couple of stuffed Pikachus.

“If you wanted to grab that book I was telling you about,” Anthony continues, cutting up another strawberry like it’s nothing. “I left it on my bed.”

Ian nods, feigning innocence as he waves goodbye to a few crew members who are already on their way out. He looks both ways once he’s in the hall, and then slides into Anthony’s room.

It’s like Anthony’s room: lite version, basically. Their own version of a hotel room, a home away from home when they were both in Sacramento instead of LA.

Groaning, Ian drops into the bed face first, taking a few slow moments before he presses himself up onto his elbow and rolls onto his back. He’s exhausted but also kind of turned on; he’d been watching Anthony run around shirtless all day and it had done all kinds of things to his insides.

Twenty minutes later he’s in and out of sleep, still fantasizing about the slope of Anthony’s ass, when the door cracks open. 

Ian is surprised and a little ashamed of himself until he realizes that it’s just Anthony, grinning and closing the door behind himself. It’s a little bit dirty, a little bit just on this side of wrong for the two of them to be in here alone together with their own employees on the other side of the door. Anthony throws the lock, just to make sure.

“I couldn’t wait any longer,” Anthony admits, crawling up onto the bed.

Grinning, Ian pushes himself up onto his elbows and greets Anthony face first, their lips pressing together as Anthony crawls up over his torso.


	28. a long steady road, oh travel be kind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Type: Drama/Romance. Plot: While traveling to Sacramento, the plane crashes and everyone dies. Including Anthony. Ian is heartbroken from the lost of his best friend as soon as he learns. While sleeping, Anthony's ghost starts appearing Ian's dreams, remembering to him the amazing times they shared as a couple. Every morning Ian wakes up with tears of sadness and one night he sees a falling stars and wishes to see Anthony for one last time.

Ian had gone through some shit in his life.

He’d lost his grandparents, his childhood pet. As a child, he’d watched The Fox and the Hound and My Girl, and listened to every sad song that was on the radio between 1996 and 2001.

Nothing - nothing - could have prepared him for the loss that he feels when Anthony dies. It so violently painful, losing him, that nothing really makes sense anymore. Everything reminds him of Anthony; this song, that show, a shirt, the back of a stranger’s head.

Some nights it’s so bad that it incapacitates him. He doesn’t know how to process it, again - realizing that Anthony is not here, that he will never be here again - and so he sits, quietly, by himself, remembering. It never helps, nothing will ever help, but for a moment, it makes everything hurt a little bit less.

A few months later, he starts to see Anthony at night. The first morning he woke up in tears, almost sure it was real. It had felt so palpable, Anthony had seemed so close.

It had only been his memory dredging up the remaining sense memories he had left of Anthony: the smell of his hair after a shower, the way his skin looked so dark against Ian’s sometimes. So many years spent feeding his brain detail after detail about Anthony, and he was bound to turn up something good when the withdrawal got to be too much.

The thing - the worst thing - is that it never gets better. It’s not something that will ever go away, the feeling of loss that has left his stomach feeling hollow and his chest feeling heavy. Sometimes he’s so caught up in it all that he’s almost sure it’s a nightmare; he never wakes up.

One night, sitting by himself in his car at the beach, he watches the stars for a while. This had never really been their thing - they were more likely to light a fire on the sand - but it’s important, to start new things. 

Ian watches the stars until he’s almost sure that they make sense. And then, when he just can’t stand it anymore, he closes his eyes and lets himself think of Anthony one more time.


	29. the players gonna play play play play play

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request for Ianthony fanfiction? Category: Smut. Plot: Strangers meeting in a club. However, it was supposed to be a one night stand or a fling...but somehow it becomes a relationship.

“Sorry,” Anthony cringes, as he watches the guy stumble into the kitchen from the bedroom area. He’s got a sheet still half wrapped around him, and a pair of pants hanging off of one foot. The embarrassment is palpable as he asks, “I totally can’t remember your name.”

The guy blinks owlishly, the blanket pulled up around his head like a cape as he stands there, clearly trying to get his surroundings straight. They’re definitely both more hungover than not; Anthony barely remembers coming home at all, much less leaving all of those hickies down this dude’s chest.

“Ian,” He finally answers, blinking slowly. He brings one hand up and scratches the side of his face, finger tips dragging through his beard. “This is a weird question but... we didn’t leave LA, right?”

Laughing, Anthony shakes his head and moves back to the frying pan. He drops a handful of veggies in, and answers, “Definitely not. Japantown is right around the corner. I’m Anthony, by the way.”

“Right,” Ian nods, still squinting as he shuffles across the floor and climbs onto one of the bar stools facing Anthony’s cooking area. “Do you remember which club we were at? I can’t remember where I may or may not have parked my car.”

Anthony grins again - this dude has got him twisted around his finger, and they’ve known each other for about 12 hours - and nods, still tending to the pan with one hand as he reaches across the island for two plates.

“I’ll drive you around,” He says, setting each plate down on the counter top - one in front of himself, and the other in front of Ian. As he spoons half of the veggies into Ian’s plate, he says, “But first, eat.”


	30. to the fella over there with the hella good hair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fanfiction: after the accent challenge ian admits anthony's brithish accent is sexy.

“That was fuckin’ hot,” Ian admits, laughing a little bit as he snaps a baby carrot between his teeth and then reaches for more dip. “Potential boner on camera sighting.”

Anthony is cracking up laughing beside him as they pick over the half-assed catering spread they’ve set out for the day’s schedule of shooting. The accent challenge was kind of a spur of the moment thing; they’d actually been in this building shooting a full length video for the next week, but it’d come around as a happy accident, and had ended up hilariously funny.

“Editing,” Anthony squawks in a funny voice, before reaching for one of the random pineapple skewers someone found at the deli around the corner. “Wanna get fucked by Mr. Bean?”

The horrified expression that drapes across Ian’s face is all that Anthony needs as his answer. He bursts out laughing again, barely able to contain himself as he fumbles a chunk of pineapple and has to reach into the pine nut salad to pick it back out.

“Never say that again,” Ian intones, as he continues to load his own little paper plate up with cut sandwiches and potato salad. “Mr. Bean didn’t even say anything!”

Anthony takes the opportunity to make a few Mr. Bean-ish noises as he sidles up to Ian, getting his nose all up behind his ear. The Mr. Bean impression turns into snuffling like a dog against Ian’s ear lobe, and then grabbing at his side and finally pinching at his nipple.

“I’m actually going to kill you now,” Ian says, his plate caving in a little bit at the bottom as he tries to steady his lunch.

Smiling, Anthony kisses the side of Ian’s head before he has a chance to get too far away, but ultimately lets him wander off, towards where Mari and Flitz are sitting on one of the leather couches.


	31. i'll build a wall and we can keep them on the other side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: fluff Anthony has a panic attack and ian has to try and calm him down by comforting him.

“I’m fine. I’m fine. I’m fine,” Anthony is repeating, even though by the wild look in his eyes and the adrenaline trembling through his hands, Ian can tell that he’s not really. “Fuck. Okay, fuck I hate this.”

Ian stretches one arm out from his position on the couch, not saying a word as Anthony paces back and forth for a moment. It’s the scariest feeling in the world, not knowing what to do with yourself. Every time Anthony has a panic attack, he’s certain today is going to be the day that he finally keels over and dies. Clearly he hasn’t been right yet.

“I can’t sit down,” Anthony says, shaking his head, even though he kneels onto the couch and crumbles into Ian’s side, breathing shallow and tight as he presses the side of his face to Ian’s shirt. Ian wraps his arm around Anthony’s shoulders and continues watching TV; talking doesn’t help, whispering sweet nothings doesn’t help. 

In situations like this, the only thing he can do is hold on and hope that it doesn’t loop through Anthony’s system for too long. The worst was twelve hours; the shortest so far had peaked in rolling valleys for half an hour. Most times these days, Anthony can talk himself out of it before it really sets in, but some days he just isn’t so lucky.

“We’ll watch the end of this, and then we’ll go and get some food,” Ian says softly, turning to look at Anthony’s profile.

Anthony is blinking rapidly, bottom lip in-between his teeth as he tries to breathe through his nose. He nods.

“Let’s go now,” He says, grabbing Ian’s hand. He doesn’t try and get off the couch, so Ian tightens his grip, too, fingers warm against Anthony’s painfully clammy skin. “Let’s just go for a drive. I think I’m claustrophobic right now.”

Nodding, Ian pulls him forward with the arm still wrapped around his shoulders, and then loops his free arm around Anthony’s waist. He hugs him tight, presses a kiss to the skin right above where his collar starts, and says, “Let’s go.”


	32. date night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Type: Comedy/Fluff Plot: Ian and Anthony go for an Easter Egg hunt in the forest but they lost themselves which leads to funny situations.

Jaden organizes an ‘adult easter egg hunt,’ which seemed like a better idea before it involved them all trekking through a Southern California national park carrying bags of hotel sized liquor bottles, candy, condoms, rolled joints, and bottles of Gatorade - “for later,” she’d said.

Ian follows Anthony most of the way into the park, mostly because he hates walking up inclines but ultimately because he appreciates the way that Anthony’s ass looks in this particular pair of shorts. When they get to the spot Jaden Google mapped, everyone sits down to eat lunch while she takes off into the woods to hide their holiday treats.

Which is how, an hour later, Ian finds himself still trailing along after Anthony. Now, however, they’re hopelessly lost. On the plus side, he’s had two mini bottles of vodka, and is currently working on an orange Gatorade with a pocket full of flavored condoms.

“Can we go back now?” Ian asks, cracking into a Halloween sized chocolate bar. He’s been the donkey in their adventure; Anthony is way more competitive, he’s been climbing rocks and all kinds of shit to find the little things Jaden had probably not so carefully hidden. “I’d rather be at home eating and fucking.”

Anthony gives him a wry look over his shoulder, but doesn’t really answer him. Instead he just continues on, stooping down to pick up another mini Mars bar from where it was not so surreptitiously hidden beside a rock.

“I found you more candy,” He says, tossing it over his shoulder. Ian catches it in one hand and cracks into it as he swallows the last bite of the previous one he’d been working on.

Honestly he’s more interested in laying in bed all day. He could give or take the seasonal candy, doesn’t really have a need for the condoms, and has an entire bar full of human sized bottles of liquor back at home. Which means, for some stupid reason, he’s doing this entirely for Anthony’s benefit.

“Let’s have sex behind a tree or something,” He says, as Anthony jumps back onto the trail from where he’d been up on top of a rock.

Anthony grins and reaches down to grab his hand, swinging them together for a few beats as he says, “You’re so romantic.”

“I’m serious! This is an adult easter egg hunt, right? It’s pretty much our responsibility,” Ian says, mouth half full of Mars bar. “I can’t think of a better way to spend easter.”

Laughing, Anthony stops with the obsessive prize hunting as they wander down the trail side by side, still holding hands. Distantly, he’s almost sure he hears Joven screaming.

“I’m sure our friends would really appreciate stumbling across the two of us boning behind a tree,” Anthony grins. “Although I never have had sex in the woods before.”

Ian makes a noise of excitement as he swallows the Mars bar and says, “Me either! Let’s do it, come on. It’s easter. The easter bunny wants you to.”

“The easter bunny or jesus?” Anthony asks, accepting the half empty Gatorade bottle that Ian hands him. He opens the lid one handed and takes a few sips before he re-considers and says, “I guess it is pretty nice out today.”

Grinning, Ian nods and points out the next sheltered looking spot they walk by. Actual sex is kind of out of the question, logistics wise, so he settles for Anthony sucking him off behind a massive fallen tree.

Happy easter, he tweets later, on the car ride home.


	33. bunny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Category: Smut/Fluff. It's Easter and Anthony has a special dinner planned. But Ian is more focused on some other "activities"

There are a lot of things Ian has done for Anthony that he’d never really expected to do for someone.

This list includes, but is not limited to: baby talk in public, not smoking like a chimney every time he drinks, and shaving his balls. One thing he is not going to do - today, or ever - is subscribe to Anthony’s fruit and dirt eating habits. It works for him, and that’s awesome, but Ian likes to eat microwave chicken nuggets and scary looking burritos from equally scary looking food carts.

It’s practically part of his personality, now.

So to say that Ian isn’t exactly super into the easter dinner Anthony is making is kind of an understatement. He’ll eat it, and secretly probably enjoy it, but will also be missing his mom’s easter ham and all of the garbage food that followed it.

He’s also a little sidetracked because Anthony has been standing there cooking in a tank top and pair of pajama pants all day, and Ian would really just like to get up in that.

“I’m seriously going to drop this in the sink,” Anthony is laughing, elbows awkwardly stuck out at an angle because of Ian’s arms wrapped around his middle. He’s holding a bowl full of pesto in one hand, and a wooden spoon in the other that he’s already tried to smack Ian with. “Don’t tickle me.”

Ian has one hand up the front of Anthony’s tank top, and one hand down the front of Anthony’s pants.

“If you think I’m trying to tickle you, we have a problem,” Ian says, pressing Anthony forward into the counter. Anthony laughs again and presses his own body back against Ian’s, ass first. Ian looks over Anthony’s shoulder at the bowl and can’t help but ask, “What is that?”

Anthony works around Ian’s hands sliding around to the various locations underneath his clothes, and reaches for the olive oil.

“Pesto and squash spaghetti,” He answers, groaning a little under his breath when Ian wraps a hand around his cock and he grinds back a little without even thinking about it. “You liked it last time.”

Resting his face against Anthony’s shoulder, Ian grins into the skin there and murmurs, voice rough, “Okay.”


	34. d yu wnt t knw

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ian and Anthony drunk sexual grinding at Coachella 2015. :D

The whole thing is a little more “celebrities wearing flower crowns” than Ian is entirely comfortable with, but Anthony had wanted to see Circa Survive in some kind of throwback to their teenaged years, so here he is. Sitting in the grass. Wearing a button down shirt and a pair of wire animal ears some girl fucked on e gave him.

As a 27 year old man, he feels a little bit ridiculous. As someone who smoked two bowls in his car in the parking lot before coming in, he feels pretty awesome. Anthony’s also super into it, equally baked and sitting in the grass next to him, their hands held together in his lap.

“Do you seriously still want to sleep in a tent tonight?” Ian asks, licking his lips as Anthony leans over and rests against his shoulder. This weed is rolling him into a full body high, he feels it from the soles of his feet to the very top of his head.

Anthony grins and nods, turning so his mouth is pressed against Ian’s shoulder instead of the side of his face. He replies, “Old man Ian.”

It’s a running joke that started when Ian spent the better half of one breakfast complaining about the way the city was treating the curb line of their lawn. It was a joke that had evolved over the years, and was now shorthand for any Ian complaint that sounded like his father’s had when they’d been growing up.

“Would old man Ian do this?” Ian asks, suddenly rolling up and off of the grass, and onto Anthony instead. The cat ears fall off and he grins down as Anthony squawks from his position on the ground, looking a little bit disoriented and surprised at the sudden turn of events.

Ian stoops down and kisses Anthony on the mouth, letting his eyes close as the weed swims through his brain and the music settles over the both of them like a safety blanket.

It never really takes much to get Anthony onto any new page that involves or is related to sex. Anthony reaches up and slides one hand into Ian’s hair, holding him steady as they continue to kiss, Ian’s hips coming down to rest against Anthony’s on the ground.

Thankfully the attendees of Coachella are a little bit out of their viewership brackets, because it escalates so quickly Ian is surprised they come out of it with any clothes on. One second they’re kissing and the next they’re grinding against one another, Anthony groaning up at him and grabbing at his back, his neck, his hair.

Alright, Ian thinks, as he pulls away for a brief moment and stares down at Anthony, the both of them breathing heavily. He’s totally into the tent, now.


End file.
